We’ve reached the dogs days of the season…it’s halfway over!
Introductions be damned, longtime league members know what time of the year it is. New league members, fasten your seatbelts. It’s time for the annual Halloween rankings! This year’s edition comes with a relevant twist: What masked Halloween costume is your team?
1. Sina: Bane
Just look at the intense focus on the costume model; that’s the same level of focus Sina’s bringing to fantasy football. The model’s chiseled physique represents this team’s strength. Tyler Lockett’s 47.5-point week last week was the most of any fantasy player this season. Sina had Kyler Murray on the other side of the ball too and he put up a not-too-shabby 38.1 points.
2. JVB: Devil
While browsing JVB’s team, it became clear that he has an affinity for horns. He has both the Rams D/ST and the Bills D/ST which comprise two of the three horned mascots in the NFL. Despite his gamble on the shaky, yet highly-projected Bills D/ST against an awful Jets team paying off, it wasn’t enough as he lost to Sean. With OBJ out for the season, look for Jarvis Landry’s production to point skyward.
3. Mike L.: Spider-Man
Peter Parker was a scholarly high school student who lacked the macho charisma of some of his more-athletic classmates. That all changed when he was bitten by a radioactive spider and gained his x-factor superhero powers. My team’s been waiting (and waiting) on its x-factor, Michael Thomas, who’s sat due to an ankle injury, practice fight, bye week, and now hamstring injury. Because of this, I find myself in a sticky (like a web) situation this week with my top three draft picks all listed as “questionable” and Bedford’s team enjoying a sizzling Thursday night start to our fantasy matchup. Also, I’ve twice been told, five years apart, that I look like Tobey Maguire…I don’t really see it though.
4. Jeremy: Scream
I’m not sure that the Scream mask’s grotesque mouth quite encapsulates the look on Jeremy’s face after losing his third straight. Three main things have caused this: Ezekiel Elliott (and the Cowboys’ offense) regressing, Lamar Jackson not having to put the pedal to the metal leading to reduced stats, and being in the midst of a difficult patch of schedule. A caveat to Jackson’s stats is that some tough opponents are on the horizon…will this lead to better play?
5. Mitch: Bank robber
Mitch’s taken a league-low 687.98 points against to the bank and cashed in to the tune of a 5-2 record. As he said though, can’t fault him for playing his opponent, and I do recall previous years where he was on the other end of points against. What goes around comes around. Mitch has to be pleased with AJ Brown’s past three games in the highly-efficient Titans passing attack. While Deebo Samuel’s been disappointing, he’s hedged his bets with 49ers teammate, Brandon Aiyuk. Is Week 5 Chase Claypool or Week 7 Chase Claypool the real Chase Claypool?
6. Sean: Guy Fawkes
Outspoken league contrarian (he once denied himself the benefit of a temporary Zilver’s League rule), Sean Irvine, would be the Zoodell’s member most likely to don the Guy Fawkes mask. His plotting should be commended- he nabbed Gaskin, Bernard, and Antonio Brown before everyone else. Sean’s plans look more promising than Fawkes’ Gunpowder Plot of 1605.
7. Cody: Transformers
Cody successfully transformed a 10th and 12th preseason ranking by Mitch and I, respectively, into a winning record at the midpoint of the season. Some notes on his Browns- Kareem Hunt will continue to eat in Nick Chubb’s absence and Rashard Higgins was a great waiver wire pickup. He should be a little concerned about how Le’Veon Bell is going to continue eating into Clyde Edwards-Helaire’s workload, though.
8. David: Mummy
The former champ’s team has lost some pieces: Marlon Mack and OBJ. Some players have missed the last several weeks: Chubb and Sanders. This team’s currently being held together by bandages (and Russell Wilson). We’ll see if David’s managerial skill can withstand this sandstorm or if his playoff chances will slowly get mummified.
9. Mike B.: Plague doctor
Bedford came face-to-face with fantasy death, rattled off his first two wins, and is currently trying to string together a third in an opportune game versus my depleted squad. Right now he’s starting a backup RB (behind an ill Cowboys o-line) because David Johnson is on bye and Mostert is on IR. This doesn’t speak well to this team’s depth.
10. Matt: Ghost
After going ghost on the waiver wire for much of the season, Matt re-appeared to make adds of Jamaal Williams, two D/STs, and a K when he realized his playoff odds aren’t what they usually are…and as he said to deny Brian his first win. This proclamation backfired as Brian added his first tally to the win column. Matt’s team continues to float around .500.
11. Brian: Purge
We’ve seen this play out before as we’ve seen these Purge costumes before: Brian falls into a deep hole and then makes some speculative adds in the hopes of turning his season around (Dez Bryant). But this year, he’s resorted to crime and it’s legal in his eyes. Brian’s broken player-adding rules AT LEAST three times. Congrats on the first win, though.
12. Sam: Paper bag
While it isn’t possible to go 0-16 in a Zoodell’s League regular season (only 13 games), it is possible for Sam to lose all three consolation bracket games to reach the cursed mark. Can someone trade this man for Christian McCaffrey so he at least has a fighting chance at the playoffs?
Michael’s Game of the Week for Week 8:
Cody vs. JVB
Zoodell's Football League 